Kissed By The Horne

Now Playing: Moon & Tree, by Blue Rodeo. “Well I’ve been out walking, Talking to moon and tree, And the tall spring grass, Like waves on a dark green sea. So much of what we are, We will always be, And I don’t mind getting lost in your dream.”

Lena Horne’s death the other day reminded me of one of my two favorite episodes of one of my favorite TV shows, Sanford & Son. It was the one where Lena Horne guest-starred, of course, and became involved in Fred’s plot (he’d made a bet) to get her to come to his house. He did it by asking her to visit “poor little lame Lamont.” (The other favorite episode is the one where Fred gives away his Blind Mellow Jelly records before discovering they were valuable. He gets Bubba to pretend to be Blind’s son. But he only trusts Bubba with one line, “I want my daddy’s records.” Which he repeats often.

Anyway, Lena finds out Fred’s subterfuge when Fred’s buddies, Bubba, Skillet and Leroy, pay off the bet in front of her. She’s gets mad until he donates his winnings to her favorite charity, then plants a big one on him. As Bubba, Skillet and Leroy chase Lena with more donations, Fred stands there dazed, saying, “I’ve been kissed by the Horne.”

Which makes me wonder, will anyone remember TV show plots and lines 20 years from now the way I do with Sanford and Son, the Beverly Hillbillies and the Andy Griffith Show. I really doubt it. With the exception of Seinfeld, I don’t remember much from television comedies from the last 10 years.

But I’m old.


“Buy me a flute and a gun that shoots, Tailgates and substitutes. Strap yourself to a tree with roots. You aint going nowhere.
Ooh, whee, ride me high, Tomorrow’s the day my bride’s gonna come. Oh, no, are we gonna fly, Down in the easy chair.”

_ You Ain’t Going Nowhere, Bob Dylan


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